LUVTruck.com

Is that from a movie?

_________________
OK, I'm over it. Where's the beer?

Friendship is like peeing your pants,
everyone can see it,
But only you can feel the true warmth.

_________________
If you think no one cares, try missing a couple of payments...



FIAA!

SFPP!

What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?

Stress is when your girlfriend is pregnant, tension is when your wife is pregnant, but PANIC is when both are pregnant.

A nevous breakdown results when the 2 are related...

_________________
If you think no one cares, try missing a couple of payments...



FIAA!

SFPP!

It is one thing to show a man that he is in an error, and another to put him in possession of the truth.

_________________

eggs = fetus + placenta...yummm!

_________________
If you think no one cares, try missing a couple of payments...



FIAA!

SFPP!

If a man speaks and there is no women to hear. Is he still wrong?

Everyone needs to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.

A computer once beat me at blackjack, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

After twelve years of very expensive therapy....my psychiatrist said something that really brought tears to my eyes.

He said, "No hablo ingles."

wow, its back.

_________________
I like my steak like I like my women, young, tender and bloody.

All I need is my weed, women, and wine. -Edge City Outlaws

WOW

- CANADA:
- Pauline M. Marshall offers a couple from her home town in Fort Qu'Appelle Saskatchewan (Canada). (since not all silly, outdated laws are from the US)

1. It is illegal for a teen to walk down main street for Fort Qu'Appelle with their shoes untied.

2. It is illegal to leave your horse in front of the Country Squire (local hotel) without hitching it securely to the hitching post (which was removed yeeeeeaaaars ago).

- UNITED STATES OF AMERICA:

** List of Stupid Laws in the United States **

"These are real standing laws from around the United States of America. Hope you enjoy them and remember, Law Enforcement is no joke!" -cybercrud

Silly Laws:

- Alabama:
1. It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.

- Alaska:
1. It is illegal to push a live moose out of a moving airplane.

- California:
1. Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to try and stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water.

- Connecticut:
1. You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.
2. You are not allowed to walk across a street on your hands.

- Florida:
1. Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.
2. A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
3. If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.
4. It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
5. Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
6. Any form of sexual contact other than missionary position is a misdomeanor. (This is still a law. There have been several cases of people being brought up on these charges in the past 5 years alone. If the police enter a home with a warrent for some other crime and catch the 'culprits' in action, they can, and are, brought up on those charges.)

- Illinois:
1. It is illegal for anyone to give lighted cigars to dogs, cats, and other domesticated animal kept as pets.

- Indiana:
1. Bathing is prohibited during the winter.
2. Citizens are not allowed to attend a movie house or theater nor ride in a public streetcar within at least four hours after eating garlic.

- Iowa:
1. Kisses may last for as much as, but no more than, five minutes.

- Kentucky:
1. By law, anyone who has been drinking is "sober" until he or she "cannot hold onto the ground."
2. It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.

- Louisiana:
1. It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.
2. Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault," while biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault."

- Massachusetts:
1. Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
2. Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
3. An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
4. Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.

- Nebraska:
1. A parent can be arrested if his child cannot hold back a burp during a church service.

- New Mexico:
1. Females are strictly forbidden to appear unshaven in public.

- New York:
1. A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and looking "at a woman in that way." A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a "pair of horse-blinders" wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll.

- North Dakota:
1. Beer & pretzels can't be served at the same time in any bar or restaurant.

- Ohio:
1. Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public.

- Oklahoma:
1. Violators can be fined, arrested or jailed for making ugly faces at a dog.
2. Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by the state.
3. Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property.

- Pennsylvania:
1. A special cleaning ordinance bans housewives from hiding dirt and dust under a rug in a dwelling.
2. No man may purchase alcohol without written consent from his wife.

- Tennessee:
1. It is illegal to lasso a catfish in Tennessee!! (Julie.Miller)

- Texas:
1. A city ordinance states that a person cannot go barefoot without first obtaining a special five-dollar permit.
2. It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.

- Vermont:
1. Lawmakers made it obligatory for everybody to take at least one bath each week -- on Saturday night.

- Washington:
1. All lollipops are banned.
2. A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town.
3. In King County, in Seattle Washington, it is illegal to sit on a man's lap on a metro bus, unless you are married.
4. Vancouver, WA has a city law that requires all motor vehicles to carry anchors... as an emergency brake. (Ted Timmons)

- West Virginia:
1. No children may attend school with their breath smelling of "wild onions."

_________________
If you think no one cares, try missing a couple of payments...



FIAA!

SFPP!

thats a big fuckin thought, my head would hurt.

_________________
I like my steak like I like my women, young, tender and bloody.

All I need is my weed, women, and wine. -Edge City Outlaws

In North carolina it is illegal to plow your cotton fields with elephants...

_________________
-Old ride-82 Luv diesel 5spd with some upgrades
-Past rides-82 Sierra, 78 Coupe De'Ville, 91 2dr Blazer, 86 RX7, 86 Porsche 944T (rear-ended and totaled)
-Curr. rides- 1970 Ford LTD 4dr, 390 4Bbl, 2nd owner! With a few Extras 00' Civic beater...

In the catholic religion...it's OK to kiss a nun on her cheek or hold her hand.

Just don't get in the habit.

why the hell dont my podunk town have a chinese take out joint?

_________________
I like my steak like I like my women, young, tender and bloody.

All I need is my weed, women, and wine. -Edge City Outlaws

Now that I'm older I thought it was great that I seemed to have more patience.



Turns out....I simply no longer give a shit!

_________________


FIAA: Color Guard

On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other hand, we
can open all our own jars.


There are only two reasons to sit in the back row of an airplane Either
you have diarrhea, or you're eager to meet people who do.

Craig

What a mother sings to the cradle goes all the way to the coffin.

_________________