HOW TO INSTALL A TEXAS HOME SECURITY SYSTEM
1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's
used size 14-16 work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with
several empty beer cans, a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine and
several NRA magazines.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and
magazines.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
Hey Bubba,
Big Dave, Duke and Slim and I went to the gun shop
for more ammunition. Back in an hour. Don't mess with
the pit bulls... they attacked the mailman this morning
and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it,
but it was hard to tell from all the blood.
P. S. I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better
wait outside.
_________________  FIAA: Color Guard
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