LUVTruck.com

The Joy Of Boys

The following came from an anonymous Mother in Austin, Texas:
"Things I've learned from my boys (honest and not kidding)":

1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft.
house 4 inches deep.

2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with
roller blades, they can ignite.
3.) A 3-year old boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded
restaurant.

4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not
strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a
Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to
spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.

5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.
When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times
before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball
hit by a ceiling fan.

7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's
already too late.

8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke -- lots of it.

9.) A six-year old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even
though a 36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies.

10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a
4-year old boy.

11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same
sentence.

12.) Super glue is forever.

13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still
can't walk on water.

14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

15.) VCR's do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commerci
als show they do.

16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do
not like ovens.

20.) The fire department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.

21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms
dizzy.

22.) The spin cycle on the washing machine will, however, make cats
dizzy.

23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

24.) 80% of men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake
fluid.

25.) 80% of women will pass this on to almost all of their friends,
with or without kids.

a) For those with no children - this is totally hysterical.

b) For those who already have children past this age, this is
hilarious.

c) For those who have children this age, this is not funny.

d) For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.

e) For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control.

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I like my steak like I like my women, young, tender and bloody.

All I need is my weed, women, and wine. -Edge City Outlaws

Mine are past this age. Well really, boys never get past that age, men never get past this age.

I gotta go. I think Ill play with the celing fan today.

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OK, I'm over it. Where's the beer?

<me runs to grab the chlorox and brake fluid>

Same here ben.

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-Old ride-82 Luv diesel 5spd with some upgrades
-Past rides-82 Sierra, 78 Coupe De'Ville, 91 2dr Blazer, 86 RX7, 86 Porsche 944T (rear-ended and totaled)
-Curr. rides- 1970 Ford LTD 4dr, 390 4Bbl, 2nd owner! With a few Extras 00' Civic beater...

I'm sittin here laughing,my 5year old is totally bugging me with the what are you laughing ats,and I know I cant tell him anything...

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Dr. Frankenstein

That is sum funny stuff!!!!!!!!! and yes I will be trying the brake fluid and clorox

cant say I've ever done any of that, guess I knew i'd get my ass beat. Now I got to go find some brake fluid and clorox

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Most people think of their skin as an ally. Makes me rethink having skin at all

disclaimer: brake fluid and clorox........for those not inteligent enough to already know this....do it outside......don't ask me or my wife how we know this.......

i want kids even more now......i'm installing a new celing fan as you read this........

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As a tip, do not mix the clorox and brake fluid in anything but a good metal container, like a pie plate or stew pot. Explain to the wife that "It just had to be done".

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Hammer to fit, paint to match.
If it aint broke, don't fix it.
There's always room for duct tape and bailing wire.

WATCH YOUR PIEHOLE!!!!!!

At least I know what I'm doing tonight!... I wonder if the spray clorox works too...mmmm

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Resident lurker

Hmmmm, lets take a looky here around the house!!!! ohhh looky what I found some Clorox!!!!!!! now all I have to do is remember where I put the brake fluid.................




That there be some funny stuff !!!!!!!

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'80 Luv 4x4, 3" BL, 1.5" SL, 32/36, 2.25" exhaust...and fuzzy dice.
'95 Toyota 4Runner Limited 5-Speed.

um I'd really avoid inhaling any of that smoke too infact I wouldnt try that at all. if you do... just use small quantities of each. you dont want homeland securty investigating that gas cloud over your house and all the dead cats around.

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1978 LUV Truck 2WD
450 "Small Block" Chevy
3.70 Ford 9
28x10 Goodyears

i tired the clorox and brake fluid and it didnt do anything but get a little warm in the container that i did it in. i even used real clorox and good brake fluid. im puzzled and a bit discouraged that i didnt get a big ol cloud of smoke

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"but its that gut feeling of you're drawn to what feels right for yourself and what you're passionate about..."