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PostPosted: Thu Dec 17, 2009 9:39 pm 
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A while back a woman at work was diagnosed with cancer. She has been out of work since last year. One day when she was visiting us at work she started crying and admitted they were struggling really bad financially and were in trouble and were falling behind on bills. We decided to put on a benefit for her and made damn near $20,000. We busted our ass and nobody minded, it was for a good cause. Businesses donated items and services. Professionals donated their skills and all sorts of stuff like that. Less than a week after the benefit she showed up at work in a BRAND NEW CAR. Just about everyone hit the roof. I know there is two ways to look at it. For one she came in saying she was in financial trouble and was in danger of losing their house, crying and all. We thought they needed money for necessity. The other way to look at it is she is battling cancer and may die so why not spoil herself and get a new car. I have to be honest and since I am asking you guys what you think I will tell you my take. I feel like we were taken advantage of by a drama queen. Even one of the contractors who donated $2,500 of his skills, time and materials toward a job to the highest bidder at the benefit said he felt like he had been swindled.

What do you think? Do we (I) have the right to feel like we were taken advantage of or are we all hypocrites? I know this has nothing to do with vehicle maintenance but I thought I would ask out here anyway.

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PostPosted: Thu Dec 17, 2009 9:48 pm 
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This is just my opinion, but if you gave it to her to do with as she saw fit, no strings attached, it was hers to do with as she pleased. I will be the first to say I would probably be pissed myself if I was involved...

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PostPosted: Thu Dec 17, 2009 10:27 pm 
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I would probably be pissed also. I small town I live in, there was a girl who grew up here. She got pregant by some dirtball guy. She gave the little girl up for adoption to a couple in Michigan and lied about the birth father. (You might have heard about it in the news??) A day or two after the birth she told the the real father. So after many court battles in Iowa and Michigan and how many years, the couple got the girl back. During the court battles the couple got married and even had another daughter. Then after a few years the couple got divorced (like we all didn't see that coming!!!!). The father had custody of the girl and her little sister, and the three of them lived in a fairly nice older ranch house out in the country south of town. One saturday I was reading the Cedar Rapids Gazette paper and on the front page was an article about the dad. He had been hurt at work and couldn't work any more. And he couldn't afford to keep his house and could barely feed his girls and on and on..... Shortly after that I saw him riding around town on a nice Harley motorcycle. I didn't send him any money but that really pissed me off.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 18, 2009 12:20 am 
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mytmouz wrote:
This is just my opinion, but if you gave it to her to do with as she saw fit, no strings attached, it was hers to do with as she pleased. I will be the first to say I would probably be pissed myself if I was involved...



i agree if it was given with no stipulations..... but would fell very taken advantage of and played...

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 18, 2009 2:20 am 
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i would be pissed. even with cancer, a person should know the difference between necessity and a luxury, especially at one's expense.

I say, if the money was given with the idea of helping someone in NEED, and they used it for something else? you have EVERY right to be mad. Hell, the cancer may be a cover too!

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 18, 2009 4:58 am 
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One thing to consider... the new car may have been purchased with zero down and no payments
until 2011, or she may be leasing it. If she was in need of dependable, affordable transportation, buying a
new car is one of the cheapest options available. Of course it also depends on what she bought.

If she paid cash for it... she's irresponsible regardless of her situation, and basically scammed her way into
the car by allowing the fundraising and gifts to happen under false pretenses, (being behind and bills to pay).

On the surface though... it doesn't look good.

She should know that.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 18, 2009 12:00 pm 
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Well brother I'm with you I think when she showed up at work crying about being behind on the bill and such, I would assume she would use the cash to get out of debt. I guess whoever keeps track of good deeds will chalk one up for you all, no matter what the money went to.


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 18, 2009 12:05 pm 
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We do things like that all the time. People who have been in car accidents, houses that have burned down, medical expensive. I guess someone that had liability insurance, that would not cover a replacement auto might. But I am not sure if someone is in charge of paying the hospital or what? I have never been the ramrod of one of these things.

I have never heard of such a thing happening, but if so they are treating it like welfare. I suppose D.A. could look into this as fraud, because it was done under false pretenses if that is what they are doing. Could it be that she needed something to get to her treatments, because all she had was aa junker? If so she should have said so.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 18, 2009 1:09 pm 
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If that had happened to me I would be really pissed off! I don't know about MT state law, but the cops just arrested a guy here for doing pretty much the same thing. He was telling a sob story about having to raise money to visit family out of town whos house had burnt down and lost everything ect..ect... come to found out her was just a con artist and he was arrested on obtaining money/property under false pretenses.
Stories like this make me leary about helping people, because these days you never know if some one is telling you the truth or scamming you.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 18, 2009 3:46 pm 
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I really appreciate all the comments guys. I think I am right in line with everyone out here. She did have a vehicle prior to buying the new one that was capable of getting her around. Especially here in Great Falls, this isn't a big town. Plus they have a truck and all her family lives here if they needed help. There was no strings attached to the money but man I do feel taken advantage of to see her crying openly, I mean sobbing like hell about money and falling behind on bills, making a mortgage,..... and then bought a new car. Oh well, I won't let this sour me from helping people in need. This is just one that whether "I am right or wrong with my take" on the matter left egg on all our faces that put in alot of time to make it happen. The cancer is in remission and she is thankfully doing well.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 18, 2009 9:41 pm 
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You might let the local TV or newspaper investigative reporter know about this... Might be a slow news day and they would use it.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 19, 2009 1:00 am 
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Well, if the shit hits the fan for real in her life, and she actually needs the help, it won't come. That'll be punishment enough for what it looks like she did. She probably lost quite a few friends doing that, and if your town is as small as mine, everybody knows. lol, anyhow, I think everybody that gave time/$$ could write it off on their taxes.

If you loan a person $20 and you never see them again, it was probably worth it.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 19, 2009 5:48 am 
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ret1614 wrote:
If you loan a person $20 and you never see them again, it was probably worth it.


That's an old saying of mine and I agree totally.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 19, 2009 3:09 pm 
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If someone really needs the help, I am all for it. Unfortunately with so many scammers today, I will not give money! While my wife and I were in Las Vegas, Nv., we volunteered to help with sprucing up the inside/outside of homes of those in need. This was with Wells Fargo and they only paid for our food and materials. This way we improved their life by improving the home they lived in which in turn gave the person in need a shot in the arm to try doing better. It both worked and failed as every person helped is different. Our group leader (Wells Fargo employee) did some research into the 'targets' background first just to make sure everthing was on the up and up. Beleive it or not we still ran into a few, not many, but a few, that when we showed up to work on their home, we found a delapidated home with weeds in the yard, car on blocks, and just plain negelcted. But go inside the home and saw big screen TV, huge stereo system, central air and heat where the compressor was hidden from view, etc, etc. We would turn around and just leave. Whether we were bing scammed or their priorities were screwed up, we didn't care and would look for those that had the NEED. Sorry for the long story, but I have seen and still see too much crap like that and am getting pissed off thinking about it. I'm going outside and chill out now......
Oh one more thing, I would see if the law can check into that one for possible criminal actions. If she is/was in need OK, and she wouldn't have any problem with a checking into, but if not, she should be tried and convicted. Keep us posted....

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PostPosted: Wed Dec 23, 2009 6:07 pm 
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i learned in prison, Buddha teaches that, "one's heart guides unless hindered by the mind".
so all tose dudes/dudettes did a good deed and character building deed.
maybe there arehidden issues with that recipiant of said gifts of human kindness. however, please do not refrain from continuing to be kind to your fellow humans and if enough of us remove our crainums from our rectums, maybe world peace is atainable & sustainable.
fuck it, im just a con right? what do i know?

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PostPosted: Wed Dec 23, 2009 6:25 pm 
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Everybody is good and everybody is bad its trying to be the former and feeling sorry for being the latter that makes the difference.

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PostPosted: Thu Dec 24, 2009 12:24 am 
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Bunniesluv...well said. I have no issues at all with you being a con. None at all. We are all human and none of us are perfect. Hell I've never even tried to be.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 25, 2009 12:04 am 
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It could have been worse Dog Trainer. She could have been a fat guy, bought a yellow Chevy Luv, really liked to post a lot of useless boring pictures, and could have been really fond of home made pizza.

But then....that's already been done. :lol:


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 25, 2009 12:19 am 
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Tazman... :lol: :lol: , I read that thread when I first joined and I know who you're referring to. All to comical. And you are right, even though I wasn't involved in that act of kindness that several of you guys did for him, he did take advantage. Even antagonizing by pointing out that your engine block was under his bench. That was all kinds of effed up. I guess we all live and learn.

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In life there is the "Way things should be" and then "There's the way they are".

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1979 Luv 4x4 Currently going through Open Heart and Cosmetic surgery
1995 Roughneck JetBoat
1981 Luv parts trk


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 25, 2009 2:48 pm 
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yes i am with you guys i am going from month to month working on my luv and other rides my self think god i have done this all my life for i need to stay home for my lil girl that has cancer and people like that lady make it had for people like me if and when we need a lil help we are doing great i make it but i learned how to save my pennies and cans lol and the funny thing about assume ( you make a ASS out of U an ME)so never assume lol :ewink

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