found this on the net.....thought it was funny
Peter's list of truths in car advertisements
What the advert said versus what it really means
--------------------------------------------------------------
needs minor work = needs significant work
needs nothing = except a tow truck
easy project car = completely disassembled, bring many boxes
minor rust = don't sit down!
minor rust = major rust you can’t see...
low mileage = only 170,000
convertible = after driving under truck
runs great = too bad it doesn’t roll
alarm = wires are cut to sell stolen
nice stereo = to overcome exhaust noise
needs paint = to cover rust
new paint = beautifully covers rust
fully loaded = seller is too
all options = 8-track player
only 59,000 miles = actually 359,000 miles
rare model = one of 500,000 made
must sell = before the law finds seller
must sell = need bail money
summer fun = roof leaks in winter
summer fun = won't make it to fall
reliable = don't leave the neighborhood
daily driver = 400 miles a day
only driven Sundays = Sunday is race day
engine rebuilt = engine degreased to look it
doesn’t smoke = no oil to burn, or 90wt oil
trans. rebuilt = fine sawdust used to make it quiet
4 speed gearbox = 5th gear is dead
hurry, won't last = neither will car
new tires = retreads years ago
well maintained = oil changed every other leap year
drives like dream = nightmare
car cover = to help keep out rats
always garaged = embarrassed to leave it outside
family owned = driven by 6 teenagers
fully restored = nothing original
smog exempt = DMV doesn't think so
tags till next year = stolen year sticker
moving, must sell = off to jail, need bail money
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